||[April 18th, 2007]
My hamster died. :( Pookie passed away. She was only about a year old today. It's weird that I'm not sad, and when I checked inside her house to feed her, I did the kind of, "POOKIE?! WHY AREN'T YOU MOVING?!" thing, freaking out and kind of tapping on her.
And then I felt like laughing.
Like, "Oh my god. My hamster died."
After all the fuss I made about taking care of her, loving her, feeding her every day, helping her survive to old age.
She's dead. Just like that.
What the fuck, man....
I miss you, Pookie.
I fucking miss holding you and feeling you crawl up my arm. And when you bit Salvador and made him bleed. And when Liz used to carry you around in her pocket or make squishy faces at you. Or when you'd scream because my brother would pretend to eat you. Or when Melanie would come over and play with you, and you'd love the hell out of her. When you were a baby, and I trained you to be okay with people. When you first ran away and I cried and screamed for you to get out of the fucking wall -- so I had to lure you out with food. When you kept escaping and digging holes into my fucking carpet. When you first got wet tail and I was freaked out my little darling hamster was going to die. When you won SECOND PLACE at the hamster ball race at Petco!! When you'd crawl into your tube everytime I came around because I probably scared the shit out of you. -_- My bad. When I thought you were a BOY for the longest time, then when you didn't grow monstrous ugly balls, everyone discovered you were a girl!!! LOL!!! Thank GOD Pookie was a generic name!! LOL!!! FUCK!!!
I love you I love you I love you.
You were the best pet ever. All mine, and no one else's. I hope you lived a happy life. I spoiled the fuck out of you, and you deserved it all.
You were the most beautiful hamster in the world. The prettiest eyes I've ever seen. The cutest wet little nose when you'd eat food out of my hands. The most adorable little cheeks when you'd fill them with food.
God, I sound retarded.
I don't give a fuck.
I loved you, Pookie.
Rest in peace.
Here's a bunch of pictures of her. :/
Yeah. Seriously. I loved her.
I don't know why I'm not crying right now.
I think I just had such an amazing time right now that it's not affecting me as much.
The thing I'll probably miss the most is getting mad at her when she'd make hella' noise in the middle of the night in her metal wheel. Or like, having friends over and having them all go "AWWWW!! YOUR HAMSTER IS SO CUTE!!!"
Because she really was cute, damn it.
She was a fucking babe.
I miss her.
Fuuuuuck, it's my fault.
You were my first hamster. And I adored you. Rest in peace, my girlie. You were the hottest hammy in Stockton.